Many of our children have a very difficult time with transitions, both big and small. Transitions are often a source of anxiety, causing undesirable behaviors to emerge in our children. Some children exhibit a lack of concentration, meltdowns or explosive behaviors when confronted with even the smallest of transitions, such as switching activities at school or moving from play time to dinner time at home. The good news is there are things we can do as parents and teachers to help kids deal with transitions, diminish their anxiety and improve their coping skills and behavior.
Today I'm specifically discussing ways to make a smooth transition from school to summer break. It took me a couple of years to figure out, but each time a school break was approaching, my son's behavior would change and I would get a call from his teacher wondering what was going on. This would happen almost like clockwork, two weeks before winter, spring and summer break. I finally realized that although my son looked forward to these breaks from school,it was a change, and any change brings about anxiety and uncertainty for him. Once I discovered the root of the problem, I was able to utilize strategies to help diminish my son's anxiety over these transitions.
Tips For Easing the Transition
A caring grandmother wrote to me and asked the following question about easing the transition into summer break for her grandson. I have included my response with tips and strategies for making the transition a success.
Question:
Hello Stacy,
I have a 9-year-old grandson with ADHD. He is on medication which is somewhat helpful. I was reading some of your blog comments on Facebook and read that when children are transitioning from school to summer activities, it can become more difficult for the child. I will have this child for the first week after he is out of school on a full time basis. Do you have any suggestions I can use to help make our time together enjoyable? He has a 5-year-old brother and the two of them are constantly at each other. The older child with ADHD likes to boss his brother, and it can get physical. What can I do?
Sincerely,
A Loving Nana
Answer:
Here are some ideas to make this a smooth transition and a fun experience for everyone involved:
1. Plan Ahead: Talk with your grandkids ahead of time about what you will be doing during the week they will be with you. Ask them what they would enjoy doing and have them help you plan some activities together. Having a plan in advance will help alleviate any anxiety over the transition your grandson may have.
2. Visually Display the Activities/Schedule: Write your daily schedule and activities down on a white board or calendar and review them at the beginning of the day, so your grandsons know what to expect. Try using pictures too so your younger grandson can read the schedule as well.
3. Organize the Night Before: Have your grandsons help you collect any needed items for the next day's activities so that getting out the door in the morning is easier and less chaotic for everyone. Kids love being helpful! Have them pick out their outfits, gather sunscreen, bathing suits, sandals or anything else you may need. You can even have them help you pack the picnic food. When the morning is calm, it sets a great tone for the rest of the day.
4. Provide Structure and Routines: It is important to do your best to have structure within each day. Our kids tend to have less anxiety and better behavior when they know what to expect and when to expect it. For example, try having a regular dinner time and bedtime and keeping the bedtime routine the same every night. Since you are not with your grandsons all the time, ask their parents if they have routines that they follow at home and keep that consistency in your home as much as possible.
5. Provide downtime and quiet time: Intense kids in particular need time to decompress and just spend some unscheduled time doing something they enjoy each day, like listening to music, reading, drawing or building with blocks. If you over-schedule your grandsons, you will end up with tired, cranky and over-stimulated kids who will take it out on you or each other.
6. Exercise, Exercise, Exercise! Exercise has been proven to help decrease anxiety, improve behavior and mood, and decrease aggression. Starting off the day with jumping on a trampoline, riding bikes or scooters, going for a swim or taking a vigorous walk will help you all get through the rest of the day with better attitudes.
7. Meet Sensory Needs: If your grandson has any sensory needs, meet those needs as much as possible throughout the day. For example, if he is a chewer, let him chew gum or chew on a straw or chew crunchy things like carrot sticks throughout the day. If he seeks pressure (eg. he likes tight hugs, pushes up against things a lot), then let him frequently squeeze a squishy ball or give him a short massage to provide pressure on his body.
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Here's to a great summer break with your kids!
Sincerely, Stacy
Stacy Gray ADHD Hope